


Until Death Do Us Part

by Blondjjong



Category: EXO (Band), SHINee, SuperM (Korea Band)
Genre: Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Psychological Horror
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-09-28 12:44:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20426195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blondjjong/pseuds/Blondjjong
Summary: What would you give to keep the one you love?





	Until Death Do Us Part

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first and only time I've written something spook, well outside my comfort zone here

His hands are shaking, it’s something Jongin only just notices in the dank light of the bedroom. The sheets his torso is wrapped up in have been pulled away from the edges of the mattress, pooled in a tangled mass around his waist. He’s not sure the last time he ate. Jongin is not even sure the date any more, uncertain how long he’s been gone for. Little yellow squares of paper litter the possessions of his small room, stuck on walls, and shelves, doors, and picture frames. There’s more than a few angry, red splits in his knuckles, and a deep angry gash across his palm; a faint ache with each curl of long fingers. Jongin pulls his legs up, bending his knees to wrap his arms tight around them, a fruitless attempt at self comfort.

Where has he been? What has he done this time?   
  
It’s a horrid feeling: the way his stomach is knotted tight, wanting to force its contents up and out in purge. Jongin is numb from every finger tip straight through to his core, feeling as if he’s spent too long outside in a winter cold. Wasting away and unable to do anything about it, he's unable to stop the reeling car crash his life had become.   
  
Jongin still remembers the first time Baekhyun had spoken up about it, his delicate brow furrowed deep, his eyes the picture of a long growing worry, as he regarded Jongin that summer’s day.    
  
_ “You’re scaring me.” _   
  
Baekhyun’s words echo in trill, repeating over, and over, in his mind. Jongin curls forwards, letting out the most pathetic of whimpers as he presses his forehead to bony knees. He started off six months ago clinging hard to memories, watching each moment they’d spent together play a reel in his mind’s eye. Jongin had spent so long trying desperately not to forget, and the sick irony of that isn’t lost on him for a moment. Because all he wants to do now is forget.   


God, he wishes he could just forget.

There was a time those perfectly squared little notes that litter his space were a source of strength, the very thing that had Jongin waking up and rising every morning, after having long since lost the will to get out of bed. Jongin had lost the will to do anything but watch the world pass him by. The ice cold reality of losing Taemin, had ripped the whole foundation of Jongin’s life out from under his feet, and he was lost. For months Jongin was lost.    
  
That was until three months past the day, that they’d lowered the other half of his soul six feet underground. On that day Jongin had woken up with a blank gap in his memory, and a little yellow note stuck to his bedside lamp. Black ink scrawled on it in a script he’d recognize anywhere, indicating the pancakes kept fresh to be reheated in the fridge, made in the way only Taemin knew how. The only meal Tae in had been able to make without messing up. It was simple, the words Jongin had found there, but they were more moving, more life changing, than any thousand paged novel could have ever been.   
  
_ ‘I found you _ _   
_ _ I love you _ _   
_ _ I miss you’ _ _   
_ __   
Somewhere along the way in the months that followed, Jongin had all too willingly given full gaps of his life, had given full reign of his very being, over to whatever powers seemed to be at hand. The more Jongin gave, the less control he seemed to be able to maintain, and that penmanship had turned from Taemin’s familiar scrawl, to something near unrecognizable. 

Words turned from love notes, to threats. From the silly little rambles Jongin had missed so much, to the scribbles of a mind gone wrong, that left him chilled to the core, and wide awake at night. Jongin didn’t know why, didnt know how, but he could grasp the mistake he’d made. The paranoia he had to live with weighing heavy on the scale of exchange.   
  
_ You’re scaring me, you’re scaring me, you’re scaring me, you’re scaring me. _   
  
Still the words repeat in Jongin’s mind, taking no notice to the way he’s rocking back and forth. His eyes frantically fall anywhere but the sheet covered mirror, hung on the wall across from his bed. Despite his desperation there’s a drastic drop in temperature, coming on like clockwork. The sob that leaves Jongin wracks his thin frame, his breath leaving him in a puff of visibly white air.   
  
_ You’re scaring me, you’re scaring me, you’re scari- _ _   
_   
_ ‘Good.’ _   
  
Taemin’s voice rings in the back of his mind, shocking fear straight through Jongin in a way he never, ever had wanted to associate with his late lover.   
  
__ ‘Cause you should be.’   
  
Then Jongin is gone again.


End file.
